Week 1 - 6 ~ Finding Out You're Pregnant

Telling Your Husband - And Your Reactions

Finding out you're pregnant and the feelings and actions that result from that positive test (or tests) varies from the videos of the husband crying with joy and the wife glowing, to the man becoming angry (or maybe you were upset) and storming out. There are so many actions and reactions but something to keep in mind is 'Try and Be Positive.' There is a little person growing inside of you that feels all that you feel and it affects him/her whether you want it to or not.

My experience was somewhere in the middle.

I had been having some slight cramping (which I thought was leading up to my period), a late period and... I'M PREGNANT! I just knew it. I called my wonderful hubby and he was in complete denial. It didn't upset me, it made me determined to find out then and there. So I hung up the phone, dug out the pregnancy test I had boughten a while ago in case of a 'Need To Know Now' emergency and took it. I was shocked to see the dark positive line in purple show up and called my husband back. His second response was "I don't trust those things," so I told him to pick up an expensive one on his way home. One of those digital, tells you around what week you are, costs you twenty dollars plus contraptions. He came home, I took it and yes, I was still pregnant. He looked at both tests side by side announcing that we were to be parents and then looked at me, shook my hand and said "congratulations Laura."

"Congratulations Laura." 

A little underwhelming to say the least but we were both shocked. We had talked about trying for another baby but hadn't really came to a conclusion about anything and now here we were with a conclusion - we were going to have a baby. I had so many emotions! I was scared, how were we going to do this? I am the main financial provider in our household while my husband is working on his engineering degree. With a baby on the way I knew that somewhere down the line I would have to quit my job. I was excited, a baby, finally, I've been asking God and my husband for one for what feels like forever and now here it is, my moment, our moment. Bliss!

My dream is to be a stay at home mom and the main caregiver to my child (children) and after being a nanny for 4.5 years that dream is ever closer to my heart. I love my job, the family I work for, the kids I work with and feel lucky every day I get to go to work. However the mother at my job has shared her children's love, attention, affection and entire lives with me and as amazing and humbling as that is to be a part of, I am not that selfless. I want to be the mom, I want to be the first love, and the everything. I want to teach my children (along side my husband) bringing them up in the ways that are valuable to my husband and I, putting God first and working out each day how to parent with excellence. As a nanny I have tried to do this to the standard and expectation of the family I work for but the love that has been given to me by those children I cannot describe how wonderful and amazing it is to receive and how difficult it would be for me to share if the roles were reversed. So for every working mom out there who shares her children's love with another I salute you but I do not want to have to join you.

So to get back to the topic at hand, you're pregnant - how do you feel, how do you tell him, how do you tell them... Take your situation into account. Trust yourself to make the right choice. This is not the time to confide in your best friend, sister or mother. This is the time to let the joy creep in and the wonder to fill you no matter what. This is the time to trust your husband or father of your child for a positive response and if it's not forthcoming then to go from there. This is an exciting time whether you were expecting to get pregnant or not. And in all honesty if you're having sex then you need to expect to get pregnant or be able to get pregnant no matter what because that is usually the wonderful, complex end result in making love even if you're practicing "safe sex."

Lastly, my husband (and I for that matter) may not have started this pregnancy journey with me in the most believing, joyful manner but what really counts is the end result. Our result is that we are both very excited! We are happy to be soon to be parents and even though our situation isn't ideal, the truth is, there is no good or perfect time to have a baby, it just all comes together and works out in the end. There is no ideal, there just is. Our is, is that we are having a baby, Lord willing and so we are preparing for our little addition which is a miracle in itself, a story for a different post.

Look for the healing and sunshine!

Laura xo